Christmas, women and the idea of home

Christmas time is coming. I've completed my papers and finished up some contracts and now, it is time to take a break from the world, and settle into my home. For me, this time of year is about being with people I love and sharing food, wine and time together. It is about communal rituals and peace. It is a time of coming together, re-establishing closeness and remembering the value of friendship, family and health. Some years is it marked by firsts - first babies, first time hosting, first time together. Other years what I recall is that the ritual was marked by lasts - and we are not aware that one celebration is a last one together until after the fact. So I will remain quiet and take a break from my blog.

In January, I begin an adventure and exploration that will take me to Kenya and Uganda. I will be in Kenya for the bulk of three months engaging with women and exploring their notion of community healing and their role as peace builders. I hope to share some of their stories and my observations with you then.

In the meantime, Merry Christmas! Happy whatever it is that you celebrate! Enjoy in whatever rituals you participate. Feel free to share your stories here!

Reply to : stories.connections.moments.

I have been following my colleague Pamela Snell's blog Collectively Creating for Change for the past few months. Recently, she wrote


We use stories to decode the world around us, making understanding through moments of connection with others. We share stories with our friends, family and environment; building community, and provoking emotion. We each have our own interpretation and retelling of the same stories, this helps shape our sense of self and belonging. But in a world inundated with stories of little substance, we lack the ability to reflect upon and understand each other.  . . .
 
This relates to another thoughtful post of hers: The power of media or the poser of globalization? Here she describes the sudden appearance of laptops in an Ethiopian village as part of a MIT project: One Laptop Per Child (OLPC). The concept is that without instruction, children can learn by themselves. I say: what's the fun in that? Where is the opportunity for the stories and moments of connection that Pamela observes are of value?  It seems to me that these connections are missing.

I am not surprised by the curiosity shown by these children, nor by their ingenuity in figuring out how to use these electronic tools. However, they are not monkeys. And as Pamela points out - why English as it's not their mother tongue? It seems to me almost inhumane to walk away from the one opportunity the researchers had to engage with the children, thereby losing the chance to participate in a process and witness the shared delights of discovery. To me, that would be the story that would be most interesting as it would encourage the interaction and engagement of researchers/scientists/technophiles to move away from their electronic world where there is no physical interaction. By being there with the children each could learn from the other.

Pamela goes on to alert us to the hazards of this reality:

We are left in a desolate environment, sifting through each others tweets in a desperate attempt to form a moment of connection.

And I would add, when we are offered opportunities to connect, we miss them as we look into our boxes of technologies. Are we fearful of curiosity and explorations?

I agree with Pamela as I too applaud the organization's aim to provide educational opportunities for children in rural developing countries. But I myself, far prefer the stories and connections that emerge through sharing discovery and learning from one another.

Women, healing and community

I will break open the story and tell you what is there. Then, like the others that have fallen out onto the sand, I will finish with it, and the wind will take it away.

 

Marjorie Shostak, Nisa: The Life and Words of a Kung Woman

Shostak’s commentary is reflective of not only the transience of narrative, but also of the impermanence of memory. She creates the illusion of a wasteland – a place that is arid but gains fertility by cracking open the truth, exposing it, considering it, sharing it and in doing so, setting it free.  It is through narrative, sharing and collective witnessing, that experiences can seemingly blow away with the wind allowing us to begin fresh.

Women in post-conflict tend to be marginalized by their communities. During and after the war, they tend to be the primary income earner and caregiver to what family remains.  In many cases, women have suffered rape, mutilation and watched as their families are destroyed, their properties burned and they either fear, or experience, forced migrations. The ground has been literally taken out from under them and after the war ends, they search for ways to rebuild both their physical environment and a communal experience. 

After peace agreements have been signed, there is the progression of reconciliation and attempts to begin restorative relationships and communities. In Kenya the Truth Justice and Reconciliation Commission has ended and the community is awaiting its recommendations. As part of the sustainable rebuilding and healing of community, projects that bring people together and offer reunion, contribute to reigniting shared values and working together. Research has shown that women are integrally involved in this process playing crucial roles in the expansion of sustainable economic, political and social development It is further believed that women are peace promoters and through nurturing acts, they can facilitate change, and shift preconceptions, prejudices and patterns.

From the earliest times, we humans have built shelters to protect ourselves from the elements of climate as well as our surrounding environments - providing sanctuary from dangerous animals for example. Over time, in many parts of the world, shelters have become more permanent allowing us to make our mark on the environment asserting a claim to a particular area.  In its most negative aspect, our love of the land, and our desire to own it, has caused conflict and war - pitting one against another. In it’s most fruitful state we plow and seed the land to make it fertile and harvest what we’ve grown to feed others and ourselves. The cyclical rhythms of nature are echoed in the ontology, social constructs and epistemology of humans, and are dependant upon where we live in the world; the global south or the more affluent global north.

According to J.E. Cirlot mystics have associated the house with the feminine aspect of the universe and is equated with being the repository of wisdom and of nurturing. The house as home, arouses strong associations with the human body – the outside being the appearance of the physical self, the roof associated with the head (mind) and the base with the feet (sense of permanence). The kitchen has been said to be the heart of the home, where fires burn, food is cooked, and people come together to share in communal repast. In whatever form a home provides shelter and is perceived to be a safe place.

In war, or under military oppression, people have had their home taken from them. Whether they have been forced to migrate to refugee camps, to another area or they have returned to their village to find their houses destroyed or that the house has been inhabited by their abusers; increasing their sense of personal violation. One of the initial acts of women once they have arrived somewhere is to nest – this involves creating a space which feels safe to them, where they can cook and set about recreating a sense of normalcy in their and their families lives.

The concept of dialogue is important as the exchange of experiences can strengthen local ‘capacities for peace’ in order to construct relational spaces. Social support is critical to rebuilding and transforming the community, and to bringing sustainable peace. In addition, ritual is vital as it gives meaning to and can help define and shape identity. Ritual can facilitate “communication through the physical actions and symbols that create changes in the ways ritual participants see the world” providing access to participating in a process that leads to sustainable peace through community healing.

  

So the question is how do we help? Can we create or co-create projects that will offer some solace, capacity building and opportunities to build self-esteem, confidence and interpersonal relationships, for those who have witnessed death, battle, inhumane treatment, and have survived in a difficult physical environment?

We must consider the different ontologies obviously, and we must ensure, when undertaking projects that we are not imposing our own ideals and goals onto another community. The arts are a means through which we can collectively navigate the new terrains as through participation, both individuals and communities can heal, children can be nurtured to reintegrate and mothers can foster a renewed sense of self-worth. It is the hope that reconciliation and peace can be achieved through the process, dialogue and understanding created in the relationships developed while participating in arts projects. But beyond that it is hoped that by rebuilding community, by acknowledging the past and looking toward the future that this peace is assured sustainability.

The idea of sharing stories, co-creating a space that is reflective of transformation will resonate with not only the women and youth, but also the community as a whole. Through the art processes, witnessing, and sharing of experience, participants will gain an enhanced sense of self-worth, empathy, and hopefulness and move toward a sustainable peace.

Community Healing and the Arts: A case study

In 2004, ten years after the Rwandan Genocide, Lily Yeh visited  Giseyena, Rwanda by way of an invitation of a local Red Cross representative. There, she was shown two sites: a mass grave covered by a crumbling structure and a nearby village where genocide survivors lived.

From 2005 to 2007 Lily Yeh and the Barefoot Artists worked with nearly 100 women, all survivors of the genocide, and several hundred children, volunteers from neighbouring cities and the US. Together, they created a memorial garden that honoured those who died in the genocide, and painted murals on the houses of the villagers - transforming a desolate area, into one that was welcoming and uplifting. The project illustrates the benefits of using the arts as a vehicle for community healing and the transformation that care is given in creating personal environments.

This short clip from a documentary by Chris Landy reflects the power bringing the arts into a community has had on restoring a sense of peace.

Stories and Truth

Storytelling is an art and it seems to me that it can be used to heal injustices and hurts caused by others. It involves a teller and an audience. It's as simple as that. Stories can be told by both men and women of all ages. In some cultures, it is men who hold the place as storytellers, and in other cultures, it is the women who lead in this role - many times in more private venues. Certainly fables tell us stories that communicate a lesson through indirect means - the tortoise took his time in his race against the hare and despite the hare's speed, the tortoise won as he was slow and methodical - the lesson . . . don't rush things and what is perceived as truth is not necessarily so.

Storytelling, like all the arts, provides an intuitive or non-discursive, way of knowing - offering up a fresh perspective of how we perceive our world. We are united in the relationships that are created in the process of either telling or by acting as listener and witness to the telling. Stories offer us an opportunity to get a glimpse of the Other and expand our imagination.

Stories are not always verbal. They can be told in a variety of ways and can be either fictional truths - truth with a bit of artistic license thrown in - or they can be a recounting of our personal experiences.

Below is an example in which visual art and the written word are combined as a means of storytelling. American photographer Judy Gelles worked with inner city fourth graders in various cities throughout the United States. The image and words below convey a personal story by just a few words and the image enhances the tale by creating a feeling of  . . . perhaps shame, perhaps barriers, or grief.

  

Stories can also be told without the use of words. Images alone and a moment of thought and imagination from the viewer/recipient, can communicate a wealth of information. When I was working throughout the Sri Lankan Jaffna Peninsula after the 2004 tsunami, I asked some young women to paint an image that would tell a story. The watercolour below was painted by an eighteen year old who had survived both the tsunami and the civil war. The image not only tells her own personal narrative, but also conveys a collective story that is representative of what so many experienced during this and other natural disasters.

I wonder though, can telling stories that are true sometimes re-open wounds? Is it sometimes better to forgive and forget in order to reconstruct our lives? Evidence has shown that sharing stories is an important part of individual's healing, but is it always beneficial? Is this notion yet another construct of the global north - one in which we impose our practice on those living in the global south? Is it applicable in all cases?  How do we, and why should we, retell narratives that might speak of atrocities when a community is trying to reconstruct their lives. For instance in post-war reconciliation where children have been both victim and perpetrators of violence, is it necessary for the victims of their violence to retell stories publicly, or is there a risk to the general well-being of those trying to re-integrate these children into the community? Does the risk out weigh the benefit?

In many ways telling truthful stories can help to rebuild a community but we must use caution - it is not a "one size fits all".

Women's experience of war and her role in peace

There are two sides of war - one that we talk about and see - the anonymous victim, the inevitability of rape, and the objective discussion of casualties, operations and death. The other side, Zainab Salbi challenges us to think about, is the side of the social fabric of a society that has been torn by destruction and fear and of the thunderous the silence of humanity. It is this latter side of war, the social humanity side, where women are actively involved in nurturing.

Founder of Women for Women, Iraq born Zainab Salbi has spent her life committed to helping women rebuild their lives and communities. Her 2010 TED Salbi talks about the way in which women experience war and the role of  women in maintaining community throughout the violence. Her talk is inspiring. She tells stories about women performing puppet shows, while bombings continue outside, to distract the children; a music teacher who keeps school open and continues to teach music throughout the war so children can continue to play their instruments; one woman after a bombing collected all the flour she could find and made bread to share with her community in case there was no ceasefire the following day. Salbi expresses how men and women interpret peace differently - as a halt to fighting or as the return of schools and jobs. Women keep life going during the destruction of war.

She advocates for the involvement of women at the peace table and demands the recognition of the role women play in re/building community throughout the violence. Her talk is powerful and evocative and reminds us of the personal side of war and to consider a dream of peace.
 

Peace and strategic arts-based practice

In 1969 I was a child living in the Republic of Ireland when the Troubles started again in Northern Ireland. My grandmother lived in Belfast at the time, and my father would drive us there to visit her. When we came to the border, we were met by heavily armed border militia and the streets of Belfast were filled with trucks. The fear was palpable.

In response to the violence, artists created murals to either commemorate events or to communicate their hope for peace. The majority of the murals which were created along Falls Road and Shankill Road in Belfast reflect either the republican or loyalist political beliefs. When looked at together, they tell a tale of hardship and violence, but also of hope. For instance, murals depicting the 1981 hunger strike during which ten people died drawing international attention, commemorate the event. The leader of the hunger strike was an IRA member called Bobby Sands, his election into parliament gained international attention before his death. In fact, the hunger strike radicalised nationalist politics, and was one of the driving forces that enabled Sinn Féin to become a mainstream political party.

So, whether to advocate for peace or engage people in the struggle for justice, murals play an important role in mediating social change. In the case of the murals in Northern Ireland, the arts were not only used in an non-violent activist way, but also as a means to build peace and heal the community. Artists can raise awareness of latent local issues - or issues that are at the forefront of everyone's mind. Another example would be the the murals painted by Diego Rivera illustrating the repressed worker. These murals reflect not only Rivera's own communist leanings but also the political upheaval of the times and raised awareness of their struggle.

I find myself reflecting on this as I am very interested in the use of arts as a tool to facilitate community healing. The murals in Northern Ireland and Mexico City, the arts, were created as a means of public pedagogy and non-violent activism raising public awareness of issues and increase understanding and sympathy of others. At other times  the arts may be used as a means towards gaining solace. In Kenya during the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, song was used when a particularly violent testimony was heard. Song, in this instance, seems to have been not only therapeutic for the audience of the Commission who had just acted as witnesses by listening to stories of human rights violations, it appears to have eased the stress for the witness and the commissioners.

So in order for arts to be used in a productive way during community healing, it important for to reflect on when to use the arts, in what instance to use them (consider environment) and what artistic medium is best suited for what situation. So really, the what, the when and the how are important considerations when using the arts in peace building approaches.

Canadian Thanksgiving - Women and Ritual

A couple of weeks ago I spoke about women's role in ritual. At the time, I did so is a cursory way, and, as it is Canadian Thanksgiving, I'd like to unpack this idea a bit more. Holidays can be emotionally loaded and are wrought with ambiguous feelings. We come together in the act of thankfulness. However, these times are often filled with conflict about our relationships, reminding us of past (or current) disappointments and loss. Margaret Visser wrote in The Rituals of Dinner, "Nothing so unites us as gathering with one mind to murder someone we hate, unless it is to come together to share a meal". I imagine it was just such a traditional celebration that she was referring to!


Our daily lives are rushed now and it is more common for families to miss sitting together for a meal. Rarely do we take the time to cook - choosing rather to eat fast food or produce that is mass produced, or food that is partly prepared that we buy at the shops. We then race home to heat it up and present it as a meal. But the ritual of cooking is an art. It demands time, thought and consideration for those who are going to eat with us. As I prepare the dinner for Thanksgiving, I think immediately of this ritual as an act performed by women contributing to peace building and community healing. The woman cooking a meal to share with her community is embedded in history and a way in which women nurtured their families and their communities. Tradition is really a reflection, or a reminder, of that part of ourselves, or our community, that we admire. In fact, whenever groups of people come together, one of the essential elements to build community is the act of preparing and sharing of food.

I peel the potatoes, carefully calculating that there will be enough leftovers to give to a friend and her children who can't join us this evening. I prepare and stuff the turkey lovingly, wrapping it in cheesecloth so the breast won't burn and it will stay moist through its long slow cooking. I methodically set the dinner table in a way I've done for years - and as my mother and grandmother did - ironing the table cloth, and placing the cutlery, candles, glasses and gourds carefully in its place - the plates will be added later once the food is served. I consider the aesthetics, hoping that every sense is pleasantly stimulated. Slowly the flat is enveloped with the smells of cooking turkey, baked squash and burning candles. I've no fire to set this year but I will make up for this by lighting the room with about 30 candles to give off a warmth that is evocative of a fire. My friend is cooking dessert - made from scratch - as a contribution to the evening (also he knows I'm not a baker). Everything I do is done with a remembrance of past celebrations - some more peaceful than others.

I'm dining with my friends and my father who will turn 89 in a couple of days and I am thankful. All that I do today is a ritual to express my gratitude for having family, food and a warm place to live. So many are without all of that and those who are surrounded by family may actually spend the day trying to find ways to mediate their difficult relationships. Those without family will hopefully be surrounded by friends or, as offered by the Toronto Daily Food Bank, take part in the community ritual of sharing a meal with a new people. I see this ritual art of cooking as being one role in which women build community!

Canadian Thanksgiving                                                                        

For Genevieve Macaulay and Jeffrey Smith

Earth leans away from autumn sun

and winter chills have just begun

to colour leaves before they die.

How their brief flame delights the eye

while the green life sinks under earth

to sleep secure till spring’s rebirth!

Virgo at last is gone to bed

with Libra wheeling overhead

and Scorpio waiting in the wings

whose tail is barbed with winter’s stings.

The Hummingbirds were swift to go,

fuelled from flowers, to Mexico,

the Redtail hawks on stronger wings

fly south in search of better things.

Rising from Lake Ontario

fogs presage months of ice and snow.

Weighing these losses, there’s good reason

to mourn a melancholy season.

Yet this is not a time of dearth,

we have the kindly fruits of earth.

the grain and apples gathered in,

the hay is saved, the ripe pumpkin

is almost plump enough to bake

in pies, or jack-‘o- lanterns make.

And whether skies are bright or murky

we sacrifice the fatted turkey.

This rite began in Pilgrim days

with pious mien and psalms of praise.

The Yanks gave thanks on rigid knees

then fell on the Aborigines

in fierce and godly genocide,

Jehovah scowling at their side.

But we, of course, are not like that,

grateful to be just where we’re at.

and with a kinder, gentler creed,

give thanks for getting all we need.

And thank our stars for friends right here,

for laughter, love and country cheer,

good food, good wine and crystal skies,

and the brief glow as summer dies.

©Kildare Dobbs

 

Aesthetics

This week, I've been reading J.P. Lederach and considering his view of aesthetics and the role aesthetics play in the peacebuilding process. I use the term peacebuilding - which is really interchangeable with community healing - when talking about a process that hopefully culminates in sustainable community healing. Community healing can either take place on a local level or encompass a much larger group of people - perhaps a city or a country. David Bohm, a 20th century scientist and theorist, agrees with Lederach in advocating for a creative approach when working towards successfully restoring community after conflict. Bohm wrote that creativity is "founded on a sensitive perception that is different from our own previous knowledge." It really is about re/discovering a common ground and approaching a conflict in a new way.

The word aesthetics comes from the Greek word for "being sharp in the senses" - so a heightened awareness of our senses. I think that this sensitivity to our senses is also prevalent in the creative process as there are situational moments that emerge from this heightened awareness of our surroundings; times during which we can gain insight into patterns that restrict moving forward and we can find alternative approaches to conflict. It is within these moments that peacebuilding can begin. Successful peacebuilding is achieved by keeping the process creatively alive - Lederach calls this the moral imagination. Transcending violence and conflict requires the capacity to recognize those opportunities to use creativity to look afresh at a situation.

So what of creativity and aesthetics? We "listen in metaphors . . we talk in images" - in fact the use of metaphor is a creative act. Lederach wrote that "building adaptive and responsive processes [resulting in social change] requires a creative act, which at its core is more art than technique. . . To sustain themselves over time, processes of change need constant innovation". So peacebuilding, or sustainable community healing, requires innovation, creativity and an acute awareness of our senses as they alert us to possibility and nuances in our surroundings.

Given this discussion about the need for creativity and innovation I am thinking about the advantage of using various art forms to help mediate communication. The image above is a music workshop that served as a attempt to heal the Tamil community after the 2004 Tsunami. There was reticence and a deep fear in returning to fishing because there was distrust of "Mother Ocean".  According to those with whom I spoke in the community of Point Pedro, she had betrayed them by taking lives and their livelihood. Through music and dancing people returned to the ocean and slowly began to recover their connection to the place and to their community - they had a shared loss, it was important that they shared in the healing process of the community.

transforming rituals

 

Women play an important role in ritual and in community healing. In fact last evening one of my professors told me about a village in the north of Kenya in which the women didn't want the men in their village to travel to the next village and fight. In order to encourage them not to fight, the wives told their husbands that if they came home and had been fighting, they wouldn't have sex with them. The men stopped fighting and the communities began to get aong better!

This past week I have been researching and thinking a lot about ritual and the significance ritual plays in healing community. I am using the word ritual to refer to a ceremony, rite, or custom that has a performed set of actions in an ordered way. All cultures have traditional rituals that link community, limit violence and solve conflict. Some rituals are based in religion others are secular in nature; some have a long historic tradition while others are more spontaneous and improvised. While there may be formal or informal elements ritual is generally used to transform a community and are social in nature. Rituals are symbolic actions that are used to communicate and usually have a space associated with them.

Most recently I’ve been reading the book Critical Aspects of Gender in Conflict Resolution, Peacebuilding, and Social Movements edited by Anna Snyder and Stephanie Stobbe. She takes a look at many rituals within the global south. For instances Maasai women sing for peace. In conflict situations these women will walk into battles to separate warring people. In Judaism, the women kindles the Sabbath candles and says a prayer over them.  Lao women perform the soukhaoun - a ritual that brings together members of the community. The soukhaoun is apparently akin to the Lebanese suhla during which a pardon ritual is performed in the home of an injured person to reconcile and re-establish friendship.

Of course men play a role in rituals and in community healing, but it seems that there is more reliance on women to do so at a community level. When I was working with orphans and women in Sri Lanka I witnessed many acts of healing led by Tamil women post-tsunami. These women also performed rituals, driven by the community,  to make reparations to villagers divided during the civil conflict. Some of the rituals involved food - as so many rituals do - and some offered the community hope or closure to those left living through washing and burying bodies of the victims. 

Much of the ritual that promote community healing that women are involved relies heavily shared experience and stories.

Here's something to think about:

• Ritual is a unique space set apart from everyday patterns of life

• Ritual is a symbolic way of communicating that puts emphasis on emotion, symbols and sense rather than on a more patriarchal verbal communication

• Ritual affects relationships